The Positive Twist

By Lori Spensieri of “Eh! Be Positive” and “30 Days to Happy”

The Moto of “Eh! Be Positive” and “30 Days to Happy” is “The sun is always shining from Behind the Clouds”. This is what Positive Peeps keep in mind every day.

Week 2 of  “30 Days to Happy”

Week 2 represents “Day 2” in the “30 days to Happy” book that is coming out soon in books stores.

The title of this chapter is “The Positive Twist”. This is a strategy with which some people have great skill.  At the same time equally large number are absolutely terrible.

Week 1 – “What is your happiness?” can be found here. Starts here and then move ahead to day 2.

HOW DO YOU TEND TO HANDLE NEGATIVE SITUATIONS?

There are many “bad” things that may happen to us that force us to ask such questions as,“Why me?” or “Why do bad things happen to good people?”

The answer is simple. Things, both good and bad happen to all of us. The difference between people is how one looks at what has happened.

When a person experiences something negative, losing their cell phone, for instance, he or she has a variety of options with regard to the possible reaction. He or she can do one of the following:

  1. Get upset. Tell everyone what happened, looking for sympathy. Complain and complain but eventually get a new phone begrudgingly.
  2. Simply accept that the phone is misplaces and then take the necessary steps to replace it. It is what it is. Things come and go.
  3. See the loss of the phone as an opportunity to get a new and improved model that you have been wanting. Imagine that the person who found it really needed it. See the situation as positively as possible.

Click here to find a link to the book “10 Ways to Happy” for more happy tips and tricks.

Which option do you think leads to the most happiness?

THERE IS ALWAYS A SILVER LINING

Eh! Be Positive Everyone!

When these things happen, one must remember that there is always a silver lining. There is always a benefit. It may not seem immediately evident, although with some effort one will get better and better at seeing the good.  Here are 8 possible mishaps that could happen in your life:

  1. Getting Dumped
  2. Getting fired from a job.
  3. Getting a speeding ticket.
  4. Getting a cold or flu
  5. Gaining a few Lbs.
  6. Having a friend give up on you
  7. Being diagnosed with a mental illness.
  8. You are running to get to the bus and you trip and fall.

This strategy involves taking a bad situation and looking at it from different angles or perspectives. This is in hopes of finding a silver lining, a lesson or something positive. In every bad situation, there must be something positive to take away.

This useful strategy can be applied on a daily basis as things happen to us. There are two ways to use this.

Have a few Happy thought handy….just in case.

STRATEGY USE #1

Have a series of “Happy Ideas” or “Warm Thoughts” ready to repeat if something adverse happens:

Be this happy!

Here are a few for you to use.

  1. Everything happens for a reason.
  2. This too shall pass.
  3. It will work out in the end.
  4. Everything could be much worse.
  5. I will learn from this.
  6. If it does not kill me, it makes me stronger.
  7. God doesn’t give me more than I can handle.
  8. I got this.
  9. I am strong and I can get through anything.
  10. Positive thoughts and energy are more powerful than negative thought and energy.

STRATEGY USE #2

Tailor your thoughts to the situation at hand.

When something happens to you that is not pleasant, decide how this may actually be  benefitting you.

HOW DO I USE THE POSTIVE TWIST?

HERE is that same list of 8 possible mishaps that could happen to any of us. See our suggestion of how each COULD actually lead good things. 

1) Getting dumped

It’s painful when it happens. One person in a relationship stops feeling the same about the other. He or she decides to end the relationship. The person left alone, not by choice, has an opportunity to be strong and brave. He or she will see that there is someone for them. There is someone more suitable, perhaps a soul mate out there. The short-term pain, will render long-term happiness…. only later on. 

2) Getting Fired From your Job.

Losing a job scan feel devastating. It can feel like one has lost control of his or her life. One must remember, everything happens for a reason. A better job or opportunity is near. Perhaps losing the job is allowing for more freedom and time. 

3) Getting a Speeding Ticket or Experiencing an Accident.

Getting a ticket feels terrible. It feels like a slap on the wrist. It is. It is a reminder that we have rules in place. These rules protect us. These rules provide safety, stability, and predictability. Getting a ticket , well annoying as it is, it shows that the system works. 

4) Catching a cold or flu

We never stop. We work hard. We chase kids around. We do housework. We don’t sleep enough and a lot of the time we aren’t eating nutritionally sound options. Getting a cold or flu forces us to stop. It forces us to rest, hydrate and slow down. 

5) Gaining a few Unwanted Pounds

When we stop paying attention to our habits there are consequences. At times we become busy. When one notices that one has gained weight it is an indicator of lack of balance. It forces one to pay attention to health. Perhaps ones diet Mist be adjusted or perhaps worse. The thyroid may be malfunctioning, or the endocrine system may be sluggish. Weight gain can be ones first sigh of a problem. 

6) Having a friend give up on you.

Fighting with a friend can be stressful.

Who needs enemies when I have a friend like you? We have heard this saying before. Do you know someone who fits the bill? When we lose a friend we have a chance to reflect on the source of tension or the reason. Some friendships are meant to be saved and some were never meant to exist. 

7) Having a mental illness. 

Being depressed can have a silver lining.

There have been so many studies on positive aspects of having certain mental illnesses. See this link that correlates meant illnesses with positive personality traits. Having generalized anxiety allows me to have a greater sense of empathy towards other people problems. Having OCD helps me be more creative and having ADHD allows me to estimate time more efficiently and accurately.

8) You are running to get to the bus and you trip and fall.

      You didn’t hurt yourself but you feel embarrassed indeed. Remember that everyone falls. We all fall. This is especially true when we rush.  Perhaps there is a benefit hidden in there, somewhere. Perhaps, this fall has taught ‘the fallen’ a lesson about slowing down and being more careful. Perhaps your lesson is that you must get up earlier and hence give yourself more time to get where you are going.  Perhaps after you fall you will be helped up by the man (or woman) of your dreams. There are so many ways to see this differently.

THE SUN IS ALWAYS SHINING BEHIND THE CLOUDS

Cara and I run a Facebook group that is dedicated to positivity. The world is chock-full of sarcasm, judgment, and criticism. We do not aim to fight fire with fire. We aim to kill ‘em with kindness. The tagline that we use is, “The Sun is Always Shining Behind the Clouds”.  When the clouds gather in the sky, they cover the sun. We can’t see the sun any longer. It is still there. No matter how thick that cloud cover is, the sun is still there. It will still be there a million years from now as well. This is fitting in any situation.

Click here to find our Facebook Page.

Click here to find our Facebook Group.

Life can feel very difficult at times. We are faced with challenges daily. We can see each challenge as a cloud. Remember, clouds always clear. They clear, to reveal a powerful, warm, comforting sun. The sun represents your resilience and survival. The sun represents the positive in your life. Even when your life is weighed down by stress, anxiety, challenges, work, etc, the positive is still there and it will return. Just remember that.

Join our facebook group and our Facebook Page. We update daily with positive content, challenges, jokes, articles, strategies and other great stuff.

Quiz – are you a optimist, realist or pessimist. – coming soon.

Thank you for reading our post. Please leave any comments, questions or content suggestions. Remember to see the good in everything and…

Eh! Be Positive.

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